Astoundingly Beautiful Funeral

711 Bellevue Ave E.

We at CSC were a bit down in the mouth after wandering though these old digs.  Big, old houses with lives and details to spare…if only the walls could talk.

 

The prognosis is terminal. They’re coming down and the predictable multi units are going up. We cross our fingers for something good, or dare we hope even great, but we wouldn’t bet on that pony.

Hooray for the art, and so much love for the neighborhood. People wandering through kept commenting on how much they loved the houses, and writing longing letters of unrequited residential adoration in the guest books.

A secret shout out to the little red house in the back. We love you.

 


Will anyone ever love the new condos/apartments/giant vinyl crates this much?

 

 

 

Veduta condominiums revisited

321 E THOMAS ST.

Oh Veduta…

Look again… Those aren’t new balconies.

Could it be siding repair? OMG! New siding, already?  We gasp.

Another vinyl siding replacement job in Seattle, the rainy city.  Vinyl siders, put on your rain boots, draw up a business plan, and come join the vinyl rush.  The new backbone of our economy is repairing the super crap that was thrown up during our last bubble.  Is this the new wave of the economy, or just sucking us out to sea?  Whatever!

Dig Slow

230 Broadway Ave. E

 

 

OMG!!  Call Punxsutawney Phil.  It’s like Groundhog Day, déja vu all over again, an ill received condo project in the heart of the neighborhood.  If it sees its shadow will it go back in its hole?


Diiiiiig, Slooooooow.

Meow.

The DiRimini condominiums – Indianapolis

733 N. Capitol Avenue, Indianapolis, Indiana

Developer: Jeff Sparks

Architect: Yeah, right.

Nick from Indianapolis writes . . .

I just stumbled onto your site today, I love how you rip into the poorly designed and shitty developments Seattle will have to look at for decades to come. Sorry for that. I thought you might be comforted to know that you are not alone in your suffering. Here in Indianapolis, we’ve had our fair share of shit developments as of late. Below is a link to the hands-down winner for Cheap Shit Condos: Indy Edition. The design wasn’t great to begin with, very bland and cookie-cutter. When the economy tanked the developer cut so many corners–literally and figuratively–that it has been declared uninhabitable by the fire marshal. That was after the 30+ zoning, building and design violations noted by city inspectors. Look and learn:

http://www.urbanindy.com/2010/09/28/from-sketches-to-shovel-how-the-de-rimini-fails/


http://www.urbanindy.com/wp-content/uploads/2010/09/di_rimini_1_lg.jpg

DiRimini front view:

Recession cutback #1:  No more windows! NO MORE WINDOWS!!  Recession cutback #2: Stack cardboard boxes, call it a condo. Recession cutback #3: Paint tiny black mourning shutters next to the windows to commemorate the worst condo project this side of the Mississippi River.

http://www.urbanindy.com/wp-content/uploads/2010/09/di_rimini_2_lg.jpg

DiRimini side view.

Dumpster diving takes on a new meaning with the right-side high dive platform.  Parcours aficionados, take note.

http://www.urbanindy.com/wp-content/uploads/2010/09/di_rimini_3_lg.jpg

…and the back of the building.

Prison exercise yard, complete with Juliette balconies and somber black doors.

We were hopeful about a happy re-purposing of this hideous eave-less, micro-shutter pile of boxes . . . but we must confess that a tear down seems the best option.  We love ourselves a good roller rink, indoor mini golf or big doggy run, but this ugliness cannot be overcome.  We vote to tear down, or plant some super aggressive vine to cover it.  Here in Seattle, the blackberries could swallow it in short order.

In the meantime we’d rename this condo DiChernobyl Heights.

Riverwalk at Redmond condominiums

15821 Leary Way NE
Redmond, WA

Developer: Roger Nix/ on the lam

Architect: unavailable/embarrassed

AMBER ALERT!!!

Condominium developer Roger Nix has gone missing.

Last known whereabouts: building new condominium complexes so cheap that units are falling apart only a few years after construction.

Last seen: dissolving his LLC and running away with the profits, leaving residents stranded with huge repair costs and no legal recourse.

Purported to be: in Mexico or the Caribbean with suitcases full of money.

So you might be asking, “Where was the oversight on this project?”

Well, it turns out the city inspected the building before it was completed, and clearly before they started growing Kombucha on the walls. We’d like to point out to all aspiring builders, waterproof everything is essential in the Northwest. For God’s sake, look out the window. It’s raining.

Clearly, the worst part of this whole situation is that good people got stuck with an irreparable money pit that ended up being literally poisonous to live in.

The rest of us get to look at this sponge-paint, rice-cake, faux-plywood, rectangle-of-a-low-slung, small-windowed shoe box. That brown wood above the doors isn’t repair in progress, but rather “accent” coloring. We at CSC vote that in five years they pop this thing onto a double wide, and move it to Aurora Avenue to join the other run down hotels.

Photo: Seattle Times

The new urban blandscape sweeping through Seattle