Developer: Wallace Properties

Architect: Kevin Cleary at Baylis Architects

Uh oh, oooh noooo!  Are those cantaloupe accents on the windows?  Hey!  Maybe the sills are scratch and sniff, and the building will waft sweet melon on the breeze.  Otherwise, this is truly unsupportable . . . and we would have preferred strawberry.

In keeping with the neighborhood doesn’t mean matching the Public Storage on the next block. 

Sigh.  Here we go again.

May we suggest a “housing recovery” that doesn’t assault the senses.

We at CSC were a bit down in the mouth after wandering though these old digs.  Big, old houses with lives and details to spare…if only the walls could talk.

The prognosis is terminal. They’re coming down and the predictable multi units are going up. We cross our fingers for something good, or dare we hope even great, but we wouldn’t bet on that pony.

Hooray for the art, and so much love for the neighborhood. People wandering through kept commenting on how much they loved the houses, and writing longing letters of unrequited residential adoration in the guest books.

A secret shout out to the little red house in the back. We love you.

Will anyone ever love the new condos/apartments/giant vinyl crates this much?

Oh Veduta…

Look again… Those aren’t new balconies.

Could it be siding repair? OMG! New siding, already?  We gasp.

Another vinyl siding replacement job in Seattle, the rainy city.  Vinyl siders, put on your rain boots, draw up a business plan, and come join the vinyl rush.  The new backbone of our economy is repairing the super crap that was thrown up during our last bubble.  Is this the new wave of the economy, or just sucking us out to sea?  Whatever!

OMG!!  Call Punxsutawney Phil.  It’s like Groundhog Day, déja vu all over again, an ill received condo project in the heart of the neighborhood.  If it sees its shadow will it go back in its hole?

Diiiiiig, Slooooooow.

Meow.

OMG! We totally saw this cardboard and red rubberband building kit on Etsy. This must be the beginner’s building set.

We suggest one or two more giant rubberbands to keep the boxes from falling into the neighbor’s yard.

We do hope it is easy to move, maybe folds up for convenient shipping, because it was obviously delivered to the wrong address.

Buy this at auction and take it away. It’ll be your New Year’s gift to the neighborhood.

Developer: Essex Broadway LLC
Architect: Matt Driscoll*

Broadway’s going beige and soon to be renamed Belltown Hill.

Here’s one side of the new condos across the street from Brix, and what we have to look forward to in the future.

Yes, something needed to be built on the lot, but why for the LOVE OF GOD is it so ugly?

Must buildings get uglier as they get taller? The bottom is a basic brick and then comes the super chintzy siding in a hodgepodge of colors.

What would happen if it were even taller, each section uglier?

Year round plastic sheeting on the top floors?

Bud billboards, nail salons, LED reader boards?

I know! I know! Condo ads!

Much like the sad mobile ads on Broadway for some Columbia City condo gem. The only way to make a mobile business good, is to sell something delicious that fits through the window (not condos).

*”If you’re worried that Capitol Hill will become the next Belltown, fear not, Driscoll Architects are on the job.”

Yeah, right.

Developer: unavailable

Architect: Weber + Thompson

Quality contemporary design.

See, it can be done.

You’d think it was rocket science . . .

Developer: Schnitzer West / Architect: Mithun

Gallery condominiums – 2911 2nd Ave

Developer: Schnitzer West / Architect: Mithun

Twenty-Five on the Park condominiums, (unfinished) – 1800 11th Ave

Developer: The Dwelling Company / Arctitect : hiding

Auction Madness!! Bargain Insanity!! All Out Bidding War!!

So what went wrong here, developers? From super slick, pseudo-neighborhood ads to minimum wage, plastic auction arrows?

Boring? Overpriced? Speculation? Gambling addiction? Chicken bingo? Pull-tabs? Booze? What . . . ?

Still . . . we humbly admit to finding the exterior of these condos barely better than some of the high-larious atrocities the city is stuck with, i.e Veduta, Montage . . .

But, maybe it’s not the economy. Maybe we’re just not that into you.

Developer: Urban Seattle LLC

Architect: Urban Seattle LLC

It’s just amazing what you cannot do with paint and corrugated metal.

You cannot turn a 1950′s motel lowrise into “live urban.”

You cannot obscure the fact that what it really needs is a little swimming pool, an ice dispenser, a Coke machine and a sign promising free HBO.

It’s just amazing what you cannot buy for $299,950.

Developer: Murray Franklin

How’s that Pike/Pine lifestyle working out for all of you?

By now, many of you know how this story goes.

Once there was a great historic block of bars, small shops and no Cingular, Subway sandwiches, Starbucks, suburban sprawl ugliness etc…

All was torn down to make way for condos for people to enjoy what was demolished. (Sigh.)

Now two years on and counting… (The developer must be waiting for the cheapshit condo market to rebound.)

We at CSC request that the city government climb out of the developers’ pockets to show some love to the neighborhood by requiring the developer to turn this space into an area for terrific public use.

We suggest that the developer provide an area where bands and free BBQ could be enjoyed on weekends. During the months of inclement weather a geodesic dome could provide shelter.

In addition, a portion of the area should be a p-patch garden.

The mayor’s number is: (206) 684-4000. His name is Greg and he’s waiting to hear from you.