Tag Archives: stupid condos

Cobrizo condominiums

4020 Aurora Ave. N

Developer: Kauri Investments
Architect: Warren Pollock & Associate

Cobrizo condos

From their website…

“The Cobrizo @ Lake Union, combines affordability with spectacular views of Lake Union. The buildings trendy industrial exterior flows into the interior where interesting colors, angles and transitions between rooms emulate an active urban lifestyle.”

WTF are they talking about?!?

By “emulate an active urban lifestyle” they must mean living directly on one of Seattle’s biggest highways, Aurora.

Do not actively run across the highway in front, you will die.

We hope they plan to “transition” some of those “interesting” copper colored “angles” out of existence.

We are left to wonder about the “trendy industrial exterior.” Are enormous faux snake skin panels the new brick?

Finally, we read “affordability” as we really can’t sell these for very much.

And a special note for the bank: After foreclosure, these condos might “transition” most easily into the neighborhood as a sex club called “Ride the Wave”.

Tangletown condominiums

2101 N 55th St.


Ahoy matey, it’s the S.S. Tangletown! She’s been beached.

Now marooned in Greenlake and listing terribly.

We love the open air reception desk out front. Is that the sales center?

Anyone for a game of shuffleboard on the deck?

P.S. We’re sorry that the neighborhood has become a food desert now that the developers tore down the supermarket… and have yet to replace it. I hope there’s fish in the lake. Those geese are looking kind of fat too.

Dwell Roosevelt condominiums

1026 NE 65th St.


This mishmash condo comes with a smokestack.

Who knows what they’re incinerating in there.

Oh, the smell, that’s why the windows are so small.

Now that’s urban planning for you.

This building is such a unique neighborhood landmark, you can say, “Meet me in front of the baby blue, copper, salmon, beige, sandstone building for lunch.”

Florena condominiums

413 NE 70th St.

The big condo cake pan plops out another one, this time on top of a bank.
How fitting.

Although, the bank might feel like it’s a monkey on their back these days.

Conversely, the condo peeps will know every time they come home if their bank has gone out of business or not.

One thing though, they do have a nice helipad for helicopters that weigh under 10 lbs.

Evanston Square condominiums

600 North 85th St.


Condos inspired by FEMA. The upshot is they won’t last.

In the meantime, pray that these trees grow as fast as possible.

Um, what’s with the flying nun suite in the corner?


This condo is unholy.”