210 Wall Street
Developer: Carpenter’s Tower LLC
Architect: in hiding
Local papers report:
Developer Surprised That Rock Bottom, Cheap-Assed Construction Doesn’t Last.
That’s right, so badly constructed, it’ll be torn down this year.
This tower of low standards and quick money was constructed in 2001 and is soon to be demolished. We at CSC hate to see people tossed out in the streets because their building is coming apart and hope everyone gets loads of compensation, free-packing services, kegs for moving day and a year’s worth of massage.
Cheapshitcondos is taking bets on the next building(s) to follow.
(A note to the builders: Waterproof grout is essential in Seattle.)
5220 42nd Ave. S.
Developer: 20th Century Development
This is a very depressing building.
Really, this looks like class C office space heavily sprayed with textured pancake make-up relabeled as a condominium. We feel like we’re going to hear a dental drill.
We would like to point out that at some time the vinyl sales flags and the plastic Christmas bunting will be removed. Take a good look at what will be left. (Can you hear the drill?)
But the upside is there’s a tour bus so you don’t have to stay home.
It will find you.
Coming . . .
and going . . .
2607 Western Ave
…Another medley building.
Burnt sienna? Mocha? Navajo beige? Stone that floats?Ahhh! I can’t decide… All of them, give me ALL of them!
Clearly this building is suffering from disease known as Mangoltberg’s Syndrome or Hesitantly Indecisive Disorder (H.I.D.) Scientists have been unable to agree whether this is a disabling or incapacitating manifestation or a disease. While contagion among humans has been reported, HID is most manifest in new condominium and townhouse construction.
2960 Eastlake Ave E.
Ruby – “Life Sparkles Here.”
Yeah, so does the air with I-5 car exhaust.
Move-in special includes ruby red earplugs to blunt the ocean sound of freeway traffic.
Is it the grand opening yet?
Corrugated metal facade…? Check!
Corporate color scheme…? Check!
Naked concrete…? Check!
No detail has been overlooked, bring on the sandwich boards and balloons.
Life under the bridge is sooo urban.