Residences at 500 Elliott

500 Elliott Avenue

Developer: Equity Residential® Condominiums

Architect: witness protection program

500 Elliott

Welcome to the Seattle accordion condos, the Residences at 500 Elliott.

This unmusical building lets out an ugly tone when you squeeze it, something like an emission and a cat screeching at the same time.

This might also be the largest “oops paint” building we’ve come across. May we suggest avoiding turquoise and salmon.

The name “Residences at 500 Elliot” strikes us as a bit misguided. We prefer “The Folds at 500 Elliot.”

Buyers: Retro gamers and your kids might like it. The street and building closely resemble the game Frogger.

Don’t get squished!

224px-Frogger_game_arcade

8 thoughts on “Residences at 500 Elliott”

  1. Origami inspired architecture! Maybe the next building designed by this guy will be shaped liked a swan. I think all his credibility just folded.

  2. Perhaps the alternating blue and salmon colors were intended to remind visitors of our salmon-filled local streams. Stand the building on its end and the alternating colors remind us of salmon leaping between pools of water as they make their way upstream to spawn. And then die.

  3. Ha ha, very funny. I like your site. I just stumbled across it. I’ve lived in Seattle for 9 years and the NW even longer, I’m moving out of state Today. I have had many second thoughts, even though I have had the most terrible experiences in this town. Bad housing, complete lack of sound proofing or just shoddy insulation (not wrapping pipes) has been my number 1 issue living here. Once you can’t sleep or have a comfy home, my health also buckles and that brings me to issue number 2 living here (health care).

    A good night rest, is the best thing you can do for your health. Being woken up by your neighbors TV at 1am, then your other neighbors coming back from the club at 4 am floor creaking and music, neighbors bathroom fan and garbage disposal at 5am, followed by the garbage truck at 6am. Fuck it! I’ve lived in much larger cities before and they actually insulate the buildings!!! It’s that crazy? You don’t have to feel like you LIVE ON TOP all of your neighbors.

    I have some apartment buildings to avoid. I’ll post a list. For now, I’ll just say avoid Avante Apts, 300 bk of Bellevue…on Capitol Hill. You will become a pot and cigarette smoker in your sleep from the wafting fumes, and in fact you will never sleep (fr noise).

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